Weekend Coffee Share – when life throws you a curve ball

Posted byMariaPosted inDalarna, Intentional LivingTags:, , ,

Welcome to the Weekend coffee share! Can I offer you some coffee? Or tea?  We’ve had a cold week with lots of snow! At the moment spring is trying to take over, and we enjoyed a high in the upper 40’s today. What’s the weather like in your area?  

A while back my daughter was diagnosed with autism, I have not mentioned it before since my thoughts have been all over the place trying to grasp the situation and what it might mean for us. I’ve been making adjustments to make things easier for her for a long time, but these past two years many things have escalated. When she finally got diagnosed it was both a relief, for her and me, and a new beginning in some ways. An acceptance of change. I am looking into if there is anything more that can be done to help her. Her school have been wonderful with all of this and I could not be more happy with their help. I am considering pausing my own studies for now. I already have a useful degree, and a great job. I haven’t made the final decision yet, but I am considering if it would be wiser to write my master thesis some time in the future, to be able to stay in the present moment and really be there for her. On the other hand it’s only six months left, and I’ve worked so hard. Six month is in a way a very short amount of time, and in another way a very long time. So much to consider. My thoughts are constantly with my daughter when I’m not with her. How is she doing? Am I pushing her too hard? I’m taking some time to think about all this before making any drastic changes (like dropping out of school.) That said, she is my number one priority in all of this. If my daughter can feel good about herself and positive for the future I am happy, that is my number one wish. 

I mentioned the weather in the beginning of the post, and it has been crazy this week! So much snow, after t-shirt weather last weekend. Crazy! The snow is gone now, and it doesn’t look like we are getting any more snow. I hope the forecast is correct. Spring is a time of hope and my garden is the most exciting thing at the moment. 

How is your week? What have you been up to? Are you enjoying the weekend? Thank you Natalie for hosting the Weekend Coffee Share.

Love,

Maria  

Published by Maria

It’s all about experiences, and the healing power of nature. Life is about choosing happiness. My gypsy soul have taken me to many different countries, and definitely taught me to be more humble. I enjoy growing my own food, and spending time outdoors. I now reside in the region where I was born: Dalarna, Sweden. I am a mom, a kindergarten teacher, a minimalist and a gardener. Love, Maria

26 thoughts on “Weekend Coffee Share – when life throws you a curve ball”

  1. Hi Maria,
    My heart goes out to you and your daughter. My DIL was diagnosed with adult autism and my son her husband too. They may have adult ADHD too, but I’m not a hundred percent sure (I can’t remember what they told me.). They suspect my grandkids are on the spectrum of autism as well as they display signs. I read a recent article which stated they think left handed people and mixed handedness are on the spectrum which I am both of those things. I think it’s much more prevelant than I ever thought it was and I know there are many things available for children nowadays with them understanding and help to have them grow into beautiful happy adults that contribute to the world and are happy functioning adults. I’m sure you know all this already especially since you are in education and are very well educated and I just wanted to say you are not alone. And the subject of autism comes up often as my grand daughter has many symptoms. She is hyper sensitive to noises, flaps her hands etc. Her school is aware and my DIL has had to have her removed from one class room to another at her school because her teacher wasn’t so understanding. ❤️
    I know your decisions weigh heavy on your mind but I have to agree with you that at this point 6 more months is not that long of a time if you think you can muster through your thesis and still be present for your daughter. She will be okay, and afterwards your complete and full attention will be there for her. It’s just my opinion of course, I’m not sure of all her struggles but this does touch my heart since my son is working on his master’s right now and I hope he’ll be able to finish. I know you will do what’s right for you and her. Your the best momma and so happy she has a wonderful school and teachers!

    Lastly, I hope the weather calms down for you and the warmth will stay around for your garden. Hang in there and I know you’ll do what’s best! Love, Diana

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  2. Autism runs in my family (as does sensory perception disorders). I have come to think of it as a different type of normal. In general, we are happy and successful. And accepting of diversity. I expect things will work out with you and your daughter.

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    1. Thank you for sharing that. I know it will work out in one way, or another. My daughter seem much calmer now when she learned a little more about why she react to certain situations. I believe understanding why and dealing with it is the key to success, acceptance of diversity, like you said.

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      1. It sounds like you didn’t like your time in Las Vegas, Maria, but this place isn’t for everyone. Either the traffic or the scorching summers will drive some folks out! 🔥

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  4. Hi Maria, Thank you for your weekend coffee share. My thoughts are with you and your daughter. I hope you both get the support you need to be happy, healthy and successful. We have rain showers this weekend so I expect green grassy fields, more green leaves on trees and a lot of flowers in May. Have a wonderful week ahead!

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  5. It is good that you have a diagnosis so you can understand a plan a path forward. Of course she is the same person she has always been, you just now have better information that can help 🙂
    Ouch, the revenge of winter. Hope spring arrives in your area soon!

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  6. It must be a relief in some way to get the diagnosis and plan how to work with it and find out the best path. When my adult step-son got diagnosed with ADHD he said he felt a sense of relief, and finds in his case that the medication has changed his life. I wish you and your daughter all the very best.

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    1. Thank you! That was how we felt, a relief. It explains so much, and happenings in the past makes more sense. It also makes me feel grateful that I’ve followed my intuition when it comes to my daughter, and how to raise her. Thank you so much for your kindness.

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  7. Lots to ponder as you take in this new diagnosis. I understand and applaud you making your daughter a priority, but I also am sensitive to how women put themselves aside to tend family. I hope you can stick with another 6 months to complete your studies. You are so close and have worked hard to get to this point. Your degree isn’t just for yourself, but others will benefit, including ultimately, your daughter, who witnesses your example.
    The weather here has been cool and rainy, everything is so green! It will continue a similar pattern this week with temps due to rise next weekend and be sunny again.
    Happy May Day! Do the kids celebrate at school?

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    1. Thank you Eliza! There is a lot to consider with these news. Still so many thoughts in my head.

      The schools and places of work are always closed May 1st as it is a national day of celebration. Everyone celebrates with their family. It is custom to visit one of the big bonfires and walk around the place of festivities mingling with friends, neighbour and strangers alike. Sometimes there are speeches, there’s always singing. We usually visit the big celebrations at the Copper mine, but decided to attend a smaller event this year. It was a calm, and wonderful celebration. Did you celebrate in any way?

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  8. This is a curve ball indeed, Maria. Autism seems to be diagnosed more and more in the last few years. In the brief interaction I had with your daughter a few years ago, I would have never guessed. When you’ve shared images of her in your posts, she looks bright, happy, and engaged in her activities. In most cases. children are born with Autism, so nothing about her health has actually changed. Now you have a label.

    I can’t think of a mother who isn’t more devoted to her children than you are, Maria. You are incredibly thoughtful, loving, and mindful of their needs and long-term livelihood. In other words, you have built your daughter’s capacity for success and excellent mental health since the minute she was born. Please continue with your studies, Maria. Get it done. Your daughter will continue to thrive in your current situation. She will see what success and hard work look like, set by your fine example, as you continue your studies and then get that degree. Blessings to you all.

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  9. I have a few friends who have children who have received that diagnosis and it seems each one has approached it differently. I suppose depending on where they are on the spectrum. They all did their research and from reading your posts, you seem the mom will also do her research and find the best road to help your daughter thrive.

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    1. Thank you for sharing, and yes, everyone’s journey is different. I know it will be fine, it just takes some time to land in this new-but-still-not-new-reality.
      I hope you are enjoying a wonderful week.

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  10. You are a wonderful Mom and you will help your daughter find what works best for her. You have always made your children your priority and you still can while finishing your studies.
    Step back, take a deep breath and know it’s all going to be okay… whatever you decide.
    Happy May!

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